I had a birthday a couple weeks ago and I kid you not, the next day I got a varicose vein. Well, actually I just noticed it yesterday evening but I'm sure it wasn't there until I woke up 30. *sigh* Things are going downhill fast now people!
Anyway, this unsightly discovery got me thinking...Maybe getting old is similar to growing boobs. Everything is going along fine for years and then one day you wake up to discover that these 'things' have sprouted on your chest (I kid you not, it seems like it happens that quickly). And while you've been wondering when it would happen to you, nothing can prepare you for the trauma of it -Especially the horrible embarrassment you are about to experience as you leave the privacy of your own room in the morning and all 5 of your brothers and your painfully blunt parents will see your newly acquired bumps and they will be unable to stop themselves from pointing out the obvious to you. Oh the shame of it all!
Everything was going along just fine and then one day...boom! Crows feet.
The next? Ta-daa! Cellulite - here you go, a lifetime supply!
Then after that? Varicose veins with a side of spider veins.
Finally, lets top it all off with a healthy crop of graying hair and a saggy rump.
What does that all amount to? Middle aged Charlotte.
Don't look at me. I'm hideous.
8 comments:
I think everyone freaks out a little when they turn thirty. I know I did. Just know that you look way younger than thirty and that's what counts!
Man those boob stories kill me... I'm glad that didn't happen at our house with all the boys. I really wasn't a girl though.
You don't look 30 at all and certainly don't act like it.
You two ladies are just about my favorite people in the world right now. Thanks for making me feel better!
And ya, puberty for me was a nightmare at my house.
since i am one of your favorite people right now, why don't you forget going to see mr. x and come hang in san diego instead? stu's brother is bailing on us too. we can't wait for september.
If it makes you feel any better... I have had spider veins all over my legs since I was about 12. They become more and more obvious with age. Just a lucky draw of the genetic pool since it is totally inherited from parental DNA.
P.S. Wrinkles are the scariest.
P.P.S. In today's media "30 is the new 20". (ha)
Man, you and I need to get together for a real "poo-poo party". I was getting ready for church the other day freaking out because everything I owned made me look "like 30!" I hate feeling old. Lucky for you, the cellulite jumped on my train. ;)
Take heart. I have one varicose vein behind one knee and on the other shin. I'll take it.
Like Nicole said, 30 is the new 20.
And you guys all look like "babies" to me!
Try having a mutated zebra striped neck!
Dude, I cannot even abide you complaining about your aging body. You look awesome! And I personally prefer my 30s to my 20s...I feel like I'm not freaking out all the time as I go through major life changes. Things seem to have settled down.
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