I overheard a conversation today between 3 ladies. One of them was watching 2 finches for her best friend,who was out of town for a couple weeks. The bird-sitting lady has 3 dogs. Apparently one of her dogs ate one of the birds yesterday. When telling the story to her 2 friends she said, "And so I beat that damn dog to death." What?!?! She beat her dog to death because it ate her friend's bird? Geez, she shouldn't be allowed to have dogs. I guess the ladies to whom she was telling this story were alarmed when she said that as well because they cautiously asked her if her dog was indeed dead. Turns out the Bird-Sitter is a bit of a fibber - her canines are all alive and well. But she did call her friend to let her know her bird was dead. Miss Bird-Sitter told her friend that she was able to get most of the bird out of the dog's mouth and then she threw what she'd salvaged into the trash. The friend then asked her to fish out the remains from the rubbish so she would be able give her dearly departed bird a proper burial upon her return. So now Miss Bird-Sitter has a half eaten trash-rescued finch stored in her freezer.
On other work-related news: The woman who resides on the other side of my cubicle partition may very well be drowning in her own lung fluid, I think. Every day she coughs these weak soggy hacks which I assume are a pathetic attempt to clear her throat but from the sound of it her lungs are filling up faster than she'll ever be able to manage to keep them clear. It sounds so incredibly disgusting. The second I hear it I find myself suppressing my own sympathy coughs. I don't think she's sick....maybe she used to be a smoker or something. It's like she's got perma-pneumonia or something. (PS - I have no idea what she looks like as I've never bothered to walk around to her side of the partition. I just can't bring myself to put a face or a name to the wet gurgles that drift my way.)
5 comments:
OH, you crack me up. Thank you for making me laugh. I don't do that enough these days...
Oh my word. That dog-eating-finch story was incredible. I can't believe you had the privilege of over-hearing such a gem, and thanks for sharing. Gilbert had to come over to the computer because I was laughing so hard.
I just asked Daniel last night if he had called you lately. I was wondering if you had gotten a job yet. I told him I thought you had since your last blog update was about diarrhea and it had been there for a while. Congrats!
I used to work with a sweet southern lady, who was morbidly obese, who had the same hacking problem. She had so many health problems. She used to have to put patients on hold all the time so she didn't hack into their ears. I couln't help but picture her on the other side of your cubicle...just yell out Pat and see if she stands up:)
Oh, I did want to point out some perks of my job since I feel like a very lucky stay at home working mom, with a husband in school:)
As pointed out, I get to work from home which allows me to be pretty felxible with my hours, unless there is a deadline. If I do have a deadline but I decided to play all day, I can work until 4am if I want to:) I did this the other day but I think it aged me 10 years.
Job pays for:
Phone, Internet, computer, printer, ink, any trips I take to Hillsboro to work, and a babysitter..if I am working:)
I also get a bonus every month, birthday money, Thanksgiving gift card, Christmas bonus, and other random gift certs. I also get to talk to my mom every day.
Downsides: No paid vacation time, people calling me all the time for questions, and sometimes talking to my mom every day:)
see- I miss hearing stuff like that at work. Seriously- a dead, trash rescued bird funeral? Do you think your co-worker will be invited to attend the memorial service?
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